- Megan Fox is literally painful to look at. Josh and I had a conversation the other day about how when watching video footage of her, we get physically sick to our stomachs because she is far too perfect. It's painful seeing something you'll never have. Damn you, 90210 guy!
- John and Kate. Who are these people, and why am I supposed to care about them? I hear the names constantly, yet I seriously have not a damned clue what this trainwreck is supposed to be about.
- Cycling. I fucking love it. Officially addicted, and I will be purchasing my own bike very soon. Many thanks to Sgt. Caballero for letting Chris and I borrow his. Seriously, though. Riding is great. When you're on the trail with your earbuds in, music cranked, pedaling your ass off, checking out the scenery (both human and environmental), it's one of the most serene, accomplished feelings. Do it, and you'll see.
- Mastodon's new record "Crack The Skye". Are you shitting me? A metal record released in 2009 that actually has something interesting to say, and just plain fucking destroys? I haven't shelled out money for a metal band other than Slayer since high school, I think. And the 'making of...' DVD that came with it? So damned inspiring. Gave me so much more respect for the band and how they work together.
- The Mighty Boosh. At first? I couldn't find the humor in it. But after repeated viewings of the "Old Gregg" and "Crack Fox" sketches? Pure comedic gold.
- Comfest is this weekend. Expensive beer, smelly hippies, and women walking around with their boobs out who frankly...shouldn't be walking around with their boobs out. Granted, there are some women who SHOULD be walking around with their boobs out. But there are more girls who shouldn't be walking around with their boobs out than girls who should be walking around with their boobs out. Oh, yeah. Bands are playing too, I think. But there will also be girls walking around with their boobs out.
End random thought blog. ADD wins. Moving onto something else now.
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Friday, June 19, 2009
Do Not Resuscitate.
It's strange how people have the ability to connect, disconnect, and reconnect so effortlessly. Not to mention naturally. And time? Amazing how little of it can go by while so much changes. It's like leaving the table in the middle of dinner, only to return and find an entirely different meal in front of you. Do you still eat it anyway and sheepishly adapt even though it isn't what you ordered? Do you send it back? Do you throw your plate across the room and demand to know why things are/have to be so different from how they were just five minutes ago? What do you do in that situation?
Adapt. If you haven't already. Whether that means rolling with the punches or screaming your throat out and changing the world, I have no idea. It's something that happens naturally, and it isn't typically pain free. Novacaine wears off eventually, so don't rely on it too much. Let it get you through the surgery, but don't start having it for breakfast everyday.
Adapt. If you haven't already. Whether that means rolling with the punches or screaming your throat out and changing the world, I have no idea. It's something that happens naturally, and it isn't typically pain free. Novacaine wears off eventually, so don't rely on it too much. Let it get you through the surgery, but don't start having it for breakfast everyday.
Monday, June 15, 2009
This drive won't require a seatbelt.
It's good to feel creative. I've always been either hot or cold when it comes to inspiration. Never an inbetween. But lately, the ideas are swirling around with a vengeance. They want out. Guess I should listen.
The words I've been hearing internally lately aren't as dark as they used to be, though a decent amount of it is still ugly. I don't think I'll ever fully rid myself of that. The melodies are simple and fun. I'm excited to stop holding back, and terrified of it at the same time. Throw it in drive and hold on.
The words I've been hearing internally lately aren't as dark as they used to be, though a decent amount of it is still ugly. I don't think I'll ever fully rid myself of that. The melodies are simple and fun. I'm excited to stop holding back, and terrified of it at the same time. Throw it in drive and hold on.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
I got that PMA.
I am a firm believer that everything has an explanation, and I will fiercely defend that belief whenever questioned. However, patience is not one of my virtues. I'm not a fan of being left in the dark for any amount of time and forced to wait before I find out what that explanation is. Spontaneity, while much more fun and satisfying, gets me into trouble more often than not in the long run. I live from the gut. The heart. The urge. I see something I want, and I can't say no. I see 12 things I want, and I still can't say no. I'm not talking about shopaholics logic here, either. Lifeaholic? Only when it's self-gratifying, I'm afraid to admit. It's a selfish realization, but at least it's honest.
I can only pour things out a certain way. The door isn't always open. As a matter of fact, there has been a ten ton padlock on it for years. I still can't help admiring others, though. People whose doors are always open. People who just let it out in any surrounding around anyone who will listen, or maybe even not listen. Consequences be damned, they put themselves out there with no reservation. That is what I want to be. It's what I WILL be. The chameleon is a tired old beast, these days. It's time to let anyone and everyone see in.
I can only pour things out a certain way. The door isn't always open. As a matter of fact, there has been a ten ton padlock on it for years. I still can't help admiring others, though. People whose doors are always open. People who just let it out in any surrounding around anyone who will listen, or maybe even not listen. Consequences be damned, they put themselves out there with no reservation. That is what I want to be. It's what I WILL be. The chameleon is a tired old beast, these days. It's time to let anyone and everyone see in.
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Kenny Bloggins
I both went to bed and woke up this morning in what we in the industry call a "funk". I'm not sure if it was the stomach virus I acquired while on vacation still delivering a proper ass kicking, or a number of other less physical, more emotional things that have been bothering me as of late. But one thing is for sure: I felt like a bag of processed walrus shit. I had no desire to see, communicate with, or have the slightest interaction with another human being. Or did I? For one of the first times since I found myself without a fiancee' in early April, I felt lonely. Helpless. Pathetic, even. I couldn't for the life of me figure out why, but there was no way around the rut I was in. I'm typically a rather quick witted, sarcastic, and fun individual, but I felt like the proverbial teeth weren't sharp anymore. Like I had lost something. I said fuck it, shot Marvin in the face, went to bed, and hoped I'd wake up today with a different attitude. Morning came around and no such luck. I probably could have cried like a rape victim in the shower had I let myself, but I didn't. Just sucked it up and went on with my routine. Par for this course, without a doubt.
However today, somewhere around coffee number one and cigarette number whatever, I had an epiphany (been having a lot of those lately, only some of which seem to stick). The amount of potential in me is insanely ridiculous, and it's up to me to harness every bit of it rather than pissing around like a depressed, melodramatic teenage girl. I just don't have that in me anymore. And when those feelings come around, it's almost as if I need to WORK on being sad. As in I have to go over every negative feeling I have and over analyze the living hell out of each one. And I suppose that can only mean that currently in Dustin-land, the good is heavily outweighing the bad. The sad, depressed, lonely evenings are getting less and less frequent. And it almost seemed as though I was LUCKY to only have one episode of that as of late rather than several.
So with that in mind, I started pondering the awesome people and things I have and should appreciate every minute of every day. I get to live in a house with my best friend and hang with him everyday, play and write music with amazing friends, be free to explore whatever I want to explore now with far less limitations, and live in the moment. All of the time. I've taken a LOT for granted for a very LONG time, never fully realizing how lucky I am to have experienced so many things/people in such a short time (err...27 years). That isn't who I am anymore. Every moment seems to mean something now. Every conversation holds more weight. I LISTEN to other people when they say things now, and actually THINK about them rather than only hearing fragments of statements while waiting for my turn to speak. And that is just one of many things that are different about me now.
Re-inventing yourself after some truly life altering situations is a long, tedious, demanding, but fulfilling process. And I'm just thankful to finally have the heart, balls, and mind to do it. Took me numerous broken hearts, traumatic situations, and hard fucking lessons to get here, but there is no stopping me now.
Now that I've gone all Tony Robbins on everyone, I'm gonna listen to some Mastodon. Beards and Flying V's. Let me have 'em.
However today, somewhere around coffee number one and cigarette number whatever, I had an epiphany (been having a lot of those lately, only some of which seem to stick). The amount of potential in me is insanely ridiculous, and it's up to me to harness every bit of it rather than pissing around like a depressed, melodramatic teenage girl. I just don't have that in me anymore. And when those feelings come around, it's almost as if I need to WORK on being sad. As in I have to go over every negative feeling I have and over analyze the living hell out of each one. And I suppose that can only mean that currently in Dustin-land, the good is heavily outweighing the bad. The sad, depressed, lonely evenings are getting less and less frequent. And it almost seemed as though I was LUCKY to only have one episode of that as of late rather than several.
So with that in mind, I started pondering the awesome people and things I have and should appreciate every minute of every day. I get to live in a house with my best friend and hang with him everyday, play and write music with amazing friends, be free to explore whatever I want to explore now with far less limitations, and live in the moment. All of the time. I've taken a LOT for granted for a very LONG time, never fully realizing how lucky I am to have experienced so many things/people in such a short time (err...27 years). That isn't who I am anymore. Every moment seems to mean something now. Every conversation holds more weight. I LISTEN to other people when they say things now, and actually THINK about them rather than only hearing fragments of statements while waiting for my turn to speak. And that is just one of many things that are different about me now.
Re-inventing yourself after some truly life altering situations is a long, tedious, demanding, but fulfilling process. And I'm just thankful to finally have the heart, balls, and mind to do it. Took me numerous broken hearts, traumatic situations, and hard fucking lessons to get here, but there is no stopping me now.
Now that I've gone all Tony Robbins on everyone, I'm gonna listen to some Mastodon. Beards and Flying V's. Let me have 'em.
Weird stuff happens when I sleep.
I'm really unsure of what my dreams are trying to tell me lately. The night before last, I had a lurid encounter with Megan Fox that caused her to fall deeply in love with me. And then last night someone stole my semen, used it to impregnate an unknown female, and I was introduced to my newborn child. She looked exactly like me. I'd say I should get my head checked out soon, but this is getting far too interesting.
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